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Browsing Tag: relationships
“Everything is temporary until it’s not, to me,” he says to me. I’ve had to squeeze this answer out of him and at first, I’m kind of taken aback. Why would someone go through their life thinking people are just temporary? How do you form attachments like that? And why does this make it okay to treat people like they’re nothing? I’m gone soon after, because I’m not wanted, because I am just temporary to him. And although I wasn’t sure at the time…
I’ve gone through phases in my life trying to decide if I believe in soulmates as this grand scheme of things where you end up with someone that is destined for you to be with forever, or in the sense of Elizabeth Gilbert in Eat, Pray, Love and whether they are just supposed to shake you up, show you your true self, and then move on. While I think that there are the latter, and these people are good for your soul in a completely different way, I leaned towards the first idea more. Maybe I watched Serendipity…
“You’re just another 2 am,” I tell him, wondering how many times I’ve utter, or at least thought, these words over the past year. It’s a tiring concept, finding a 2 am, keeping a 2 am, not falling for a 2 am. But I’ve mastered it enough to have a couple on rotation. 2 am is the person you call when you’re drunk and lonely. 2 am is the person who gets the naked you, not the naked soul. 2 am knows barely anything about you, other than…
It was a Saturday in August when I first met Stewart. I was standing with Burt in a circle of guys and he was across from me. I’d had a few beers, but was not drunk. He had dark hair, was slightly taller than me, and looked like he went to the gym frequently. But it was his eyes that drew me in. There was just something about them. “Who is that guy? He looks so familiar.” “I don’t know him,” Burt answered. My curiosity got the best of me and I…
“I think he really messed me up,” I say, avoiding his eyes. “I didn’t want to say anything but you have. You weren’t like this before him. He did a number on you.” Sometimes, it takes someone reflecting a truth back at you to realize how much it really is true. Sure, I’ve noticed, but until I heard it repeated back at me, I had no idea how big of a difference it was. I’m not that girl anymore. I’m not the optimistic girl who thought…
I’ve been reluctant to write about the German. Part of me felt like as soon as I did, then that was it. I’d just be writing a memory. And I didn’t want him to be a memory for everyone to read about. I wanted him to be real. I wanted those days to stay fresh in my head. I wanted them to be a comfort when I was having the constant Vienna withdrawals I’d been having lately. But I can’t keep him in my head forever. He’s…
