When I was a child, I had this vision of how my life would go. I’d become a professional dancer, singer & actress. I’d get married at 22 and have my first child by 23. Then I’d pop out four more in succession. I’d also travel all the time. This was how I thought my life would turn out. I never imagined that the picture-perfect image would fade. I never imagined I’d get dealt different cards.
We all have this idea of how our life will turn out, and when it doesn’t turn out that way it’s pretty scary shit. Maybe you thought you’d retire by 55 but had to wait until you were 70. Maybe you expected your parents to be around but they both died in their fifties. Maybe you got pregnant out of wedlock instead of waiting until you had a ring on your finger to do the deed. Any way you slice it, life doesn’t slow down for us. It doesn’t wait for us to be ready. It doesn’t place things in the order in which we hoped. Sometimes we don’t even get the card we need. Or, at least we think we need. Because honestly, life is a little more fun when we don’t know what’s coming next, don’t you think?
So I sit here, writing this blog post, thinking of all my failures, all my mistake, all my lessons learn, and I have to think that from the outside looking in, so many would say that the fact that I was divorced at 24 was a failure (you can read about my wedding day here). But that’s not the case. Here are 6 reasons why getting divorced in your twenties is anything but a failure.
You grew up. You got humbled. You learned to be brave. You were bold and fearless saying “when.” You learned what you did and didn’t need in a partner, and you bartered the heck out of getting out of it. And now, you’re young and free. You’re able to look forward and seek out your soulmate with brand new eyes. You have this advantage to other girls your age. They don’t know what it is like to feel the weight of that ring, knowing it is something you just want to break free of. They don’t realize how big of a commitment marriage really is yet. They don’t understand how much you have lived in such a short period of time going through a marriage and a divorced. (You’re probably 100 in dog years by now.)
So when you have those days where you look in the mirror and wonder how you could let a marriage fall apart, stop and tell yourself this: “I am not a failure. Divorce isn’t the end of the world. I will still find my soulmate.”
Because you will. And when you do, actually saying “I do” will mean that much more.
xoxo
The Hellion | 14th Apr 16
I also married due to being pregnant..but that is what we did back in the 60’s. I divorced in my late twenties and never married again. I have had several soul mates and have loved many..life is what you make it, love often and love well.
Katie Karambelas | 14th Apr 16
Glad to hear you still were able to find your soul mates! 🙂
karenscott214 | 14th Apr 16
Love your post – Been there done that and have to say the second time around is the best. You have grown know what you want and don’t want and know what you will put up with and won’t. I am envious of couples to get it right the first time but some of us aren’t that lucky.
Katie Karambelas | 14th Apr 16
That’s good to hear the second time is the best! I completely agree you know what you want and what you’ll put up with.
masquerade dating app | 14th Apr 16
This is a great advice for those who are divorced young. Life is too short to be unhappy just to fit into some kind of societal norm.
Katie Karambelas | 14th Apr 16
Thank you! Completely agree 🙂